Straight Talk With Esme

"How do I deal with the overwhelming stress of wanting to do it all for others and not being able to say no??"  

This is a good one!  We have all been here at one point in time and many of us just never get out of this funk. There is absolutely nothing wrong at all with helping others. It becomes a problem when that help or assistance you are providing, affects your OWN personal life. Helping those in need is fabulous but not at the cost of your health, time and sanity!
 
Here are a few tips that may help:

• Identify when you can and can't help others. Just because you want to help doesn't mean you are able to.
• If you are able to help, make sure it will not set you back or affect you in a negative way. Know how much you can help and recognize when you have reached your limit.
• If you are not able to help, be strong enough to say "No!” You don't have to be mean about it just say "I would love to help you but at this time I cannot help". It's ok to say no, it doesn't make you a mean person it makes you capable identifying your abilities.
• Do not let people take advantage of your generosity. Recognize that unfortunately people will and most likely have already taken advantage of you after you have offered to help. If this happens don't be afraid to stand up for yourself and let them know that they have over exceeded your help.
• Remember, you have to take care of number one and that is you! You cannot help others- your children, your parents, and your spouse and so on- if you are not well enough to do so.  

 

For the sake of your well being, learn how to balance yourself with what you can and cannot take on. Sometimes that balance can be as easy as saying "No".

Irma "Esme" Covarrubias is a beautiful mother of 6 who offers her advice with a straight forward answer. We offer you the opportunity to submit your questions or concerns to Straight Talk.Your identity will be kept anonymous.